Sunday, September 17, 2017

22 Lessons I Learned this Year and my Birthday Wishlist

Hey Guys,



Thanks for reading the last post - the one about my Lagos experience so far. It has got to be my most engaging post on this blog yet (not most read though), with over 50 cumulative comments so far - 17 on the blog, 16 comments on LinkedIn, a few on WhatsApp, Facebook and Instagram and oh a couple of emails too. I especially appreciate Alfred's email - he sent me links to download all the SLC messages (I'm still jumping for joy) and then, I got one email inviting me to talk on security in Lagos. Well, I'm still figuring out that one (:D).
All this is to say; Thanks for reading. I appreciate. To think that subsequent to that post, I hadn't written for this blog since February. Again! Thanks for reading and engaging.

The past week was super too, in ways I can't begin to articulate (or in this case, write) but I'm grateful to God. Like for real.

So It's my birthday is in a few weeks, and as it is my tradition every year for the last couple of years, I write a birthday post. One time it was 65 things about me, the next year, it was a very long birthday wishlist, last year, it was all gratitude and this year, I'm doing a little mix.

In this post, I'd be writing the top 22 things I learned in my 21st year (some of the lessons would be about me), and to wrap it up, I'd drop the top 7 things I want as birthday gifts. I'm not exactly expecting it from anyone actually, it's more of a wishlist for myself (but eh, if body sweet you... Biko buy am for me :D, or send the money to my account and lemme buy it myself :D)

Let's dive in, shall we? Gracias!

What I learned/re-learned about life and me this year.

As you grow older, it's okay not to have everything figured out. As Long as you keep trusting God, You'd be fine.
  1. A Perfect Family is possible (well, not perfect-perfect, but perfect). With God at the center, everything is possible. Even though more and more dysfunctional families are springing up each day. Even though some men are still not worthy fathers, they are a few who are exceptions. and even though, we can't do anything about the families we were born into, we can definitely do something about the families we create. 1b. I have a mild case of daddy issues.
  2. 80/20 principle. Do the most important 20% first for all duties/responsibilities. This is especially for multitaskers. Sometimes, it's hard to effectively juggle multiple jobs and excel or make an impact at all of them, but you can succeed if you learn to stick with the 80/20 principle. There is always the 20% of work that is the most important and valuable, do those ones FIRST for all tasks, then do the other 80% next. Learn to prioritize - IMPORTANT over just Urgent. Delegate when you can, if you can.
  3. New challenges and opportunities excite me but also I get bored very EASILY. Scary! and I get easily distracted too. Also, I'm most productive in the early hours of the day, from 3am to around 1pm. I used to think I was nocturnal, but I guess having a 9-5 changed that a bit.
  4. Impact takes a great deal more than just doing your job. Making a difference requires HEART, not just sweat. This year, I also learned that when my heart isn't somewhere, I can't work. I'm not the kind of person who works out of obligation, I'm not duty bound, but if I love a task or a role, I'd kill it.
  5. Relationships are KEY. It's important not to burn bridges. People are key to where you are going and who you would become. It's important not to become dependent but then, understand that no one is an island and your next opportunity might come as a result of the person you knew as a child. So give your time and sweat to relationships, invest in healthy relationships, be the good guy.
  6. Your Journey is YOURS. Own it, love it!
  7. Social Media is Great but if you are not careful, you could become cluttered, unnecessarily vain, under pressure to impress etc. My advice? do not become your social media instead let social media become you. Sounds like the same thing but they are different.
  8. Grow your community. Your inner circle - harness them, love them, make them blossom but also, your outer circle: your mentors and role models - Follow them deliberately, and learn.
  9. With God, even when your life is spinning. It wouldn't be out of control but in control. In his control. Even when you are in the dip, know that God has his hands on you and he'd lift you out when he is ready. Understand that sometimes, you have to hit rock bottom to rebuild. So enjoy every part of the process because hey! you can't cheat the process. It's never easy, it's never all fun but it is in the process that you become.
  10. Work Culture and work environment matter a lot (to me). It is important that more than anything employers employ people not just because of skill or competence but also because they fit your culture. Creating the right environment for your workers to thrive, be themselves, have fun and be friends would give you results. 
  11. Money is important to me, but so is love and much more, is God. This is probably one of my most profound discoveries this year. Disclaimer: When I say money is important to me, I'm not talking about it in relation to other people. I really don't care how much a person has, but I mean it, in relation to myself. Making Money for myself is very important to me, but so is love and much more is GOD.
  12. I love ART. Oh God, I love ART. 
  13. When my heart is not somewhere, it is just not there and when it is. It is! When my heart is for someone, it just is.
  14. Everybody has a story. Everyone has their own issues. Everyone is dealing with something. No one is perfect. So never judge someone until you know their story, and even when you do know the story, shut up!
  15. Love Conquers All. When God got you, he got you! He'd never let me be, he'd never let me go. His love? His Spirit? Damn!
  16. Life is not always a bed of roses. There'd be almosts, there'd outright rejections but there'd also be victories. Enjoy each phase & each test, learn lessons, get stronger and Keep the faith! Know this! As long as the sun rises, you'd be fine!
  17. Run, Fight and no matter how hard it is or how bleak it looks... Do not grow weary! DO NOT SETTLE. Oh, my! Don't settle. No matter what, do not settle for less than you deserve in any relationship, in your career, in life. Settling is worst than growing weary.
  18. Do not FIT in. Even when it's just you. Even when you want to. Even in the seemingly little things. People would surely respect you more when you stay true to yourself and your principles. See, it doesn't have to make sense to anybody, it doesn't have to be a big deal, once it's not you, do not give in to pressure. Do not fit in.
  19. Celebrate little victories. The ones that happen inside of you, the personal milestones. Celebrate them. Learn to Celebrate yourself and the people around you. Celebrate for and with your friends, partners. Just Celebrate. Learn to appreciate people, especially your loved ones.
  20. Buying stuff for myself makes me incredibly happy. It's therapeutic. So I have decided to not become extravagant but to buy myself a little something every now and again. Just because, I work hard and I deserve it.
  21. Somehow, I have learned to love. Okay! That's wrong, the correct thing is I have learned to say I love you. Telling people I love them and feel it too, used to be an issue for me, but quite recently, I realized that it has become easier. I am still incredibly sensitive and yet, not open about my feelings, but yea ...
  22. "We cannot tap into that power and hang on to excuses at the same time. Your heart, mind, and hands must be free to lay hold of all that is ahead of you. Understanding the psychology of your excuses is pivotal in having permanent victory over them. So, my question to you is: When did you learn to give up on yourself? " - Sarah Jakes Roberts.
I still have more to write, but let's stick to this 22, at least for now.

.. and Now! What do I want for my birthday (which is October 8th, in case you are wondering :D)
This Year, I want just 7 things. Lol! I said just. Here they are, in order of priority.
  • A Laptop because mine is currently acting up and I just can't afford to be learning patience with a PC. There are other things in life to teach me that. And preferably a Macbook. Why? because it is high time :D. This macbook
  • Sneakers because I love Sneaks (crying) and right now, I want this particular three (:D) in this order: 1. Nike Air Huarache 2. Keexs Slip On 3. Sports shoes. (I wear Size 39/40 or UK size 6/6.5)
  • A Backpack just because I want a new black small one. Maybe this?
  • Books: Novels actually - Francine Rivers Novels (aside Redeeming Love, Bridge to Heaven and Lineage of Grace), or Marketing and Business Books :D or Sinners in the hands of a loving God by Brian Zahnd or any book by Max Lucado.
  • A Leather black very fine Journal
  • Cakes. Unfortunately, I don't like Red velvet or Chocolate cakes. Just get me plain ol' Vanilla - Soft, Fluffy, Sweet, Butter icing :D.
  • A lot of Love

If you read to this point (that's over 1600 words), mehn! You are AWESOME and I appreciate you honestly. Honestly.

Leave a comment, would you? Share the lessons you have learned this year with me, or your favorite of my lessons or say an early birthday greeting or preferably, ask for my account number (I'd really send it to you. :D)


PS: Lets hook up on Twitter or Instagram @peaceitimi


Monday, September 11, 2017

7 Months in Lagos, the key experiences I have had and How Paranoid I have Become


I have been in Lagos for about 7 months and in this not-too-long a time, I have had some amazing experiences (and oh! trust me. amazing doesn’t always mean good. You’d see!). In the next 1000+ words, I'd be sharing the most vivid experiences and incidents that I have encountered in Lagos so far.

1. Let’s start at the beginning: Three days after I got to Lagos, on the 1st of March, I went to my NYSC LGA for CDS (Community Development Service). I didn’t know the drill, so I left home early and got there around past 8 am (CDS was to start by 9 am). I didn’t mind waiting, as far as they actually start by 9 am, but then Lo and Behold, the LG Workers started strolling into the office by 9:30 am. As if that wasn’t annoying enough, I and two other girls who were waiting, had to sweep the office for them (they didn’t say please o, the lady just gave us the broom like it was part of the NYSC requirement — to sweep the LGI’s office).

We finished sweeping and then asked her when we would start. She said we were going to do the CDS at Unilag (yes, we would use our own t-fare to go to Unilag ) for what doesn’t concern us, but I still didn’t mind — I didn’t even know the drill, so it wasn’t a problem.

Long story short, we went to unilag, listened to primary school students debate and answer quiz questions on SDGs, served snacks, took pictures and then was dismissed by the LGI. But here’s where the story got worse.
Between leaving the class at Unilag, taking a cab to the school gate and a bus to Sabo, Yaba, I lost my phone — after only 3 days in Lagos! The thief did not even have a conscience, that I was wearing a corper’s uniform. No o! But that was fine. I took it as my welcome to Lagos stunt and got a new phone soon after.

2. A Few weeks later, I volunteered to help Mfon Ekpo handle projector and video interviews at Seminar, and Wow! It was like God spoke to me. Mfon opened my eyes to a lot and for Me, that was a significant part of my settling in Lagos.

3. But then about two weeks, I was to be at Golden Tulip Hotel, Festac for Google Digital Skill Trainers summit.

The morning of arrival, I woke up and found myself praying more than usual. I remember feeling like I was praying to avert something bad, but wasn’t so certain. So I shook it off and went to work, but throughout the day whenever something slightly out of place happened, I’d ask myself if that was the reason my Spirit prompted me to pray that much in the morning.

Well, I closed from work and had to find my way to Festac. I didn’t know how to, so I called like 3 different people asking for directions. Eventually, at one point, two of them gave me descriptions that synced, so I set out. I can’t remember the route, but I sha found my way to Festac gate. It was about 7:30 pm. I was supposed to take a bike, so I hailed one and told him Golden tulip and he said he knew it. So I relaxed, got on the bike and the trip started.

The bike ride was long and at one point I was going to ask the guy how far, but he turned into a street and when he did, I told myself, if he was going to a wrong place he wouldn’t make a turn (I don’t know what I was thinking sha. Mtcheew!). He made the turn and just kept going to the end of the road, suddenly he made an abrupt stop and told me to come down that we were here. I looked, lo and behold, he was dropping me off at another random hotel at the end of one random street. I didn’t even argue because, at that moment, I knew stopping was safe for me. So I let him go and ordered an uber. Then, It became clear, why I prayed that much in the morning.

I vowed though, not to enter bikes rode by Hausa men except I’m very sure of where I’m going to. EVER!

4. And then, six days later, as I was coming from a friend’s place at Ajah, the bus almost blew up. Lol! Scariest Shii ever! All I can remember is at one point, the bus slowed down and everyone started jumping out. I couldn’t see nada because smoke had covered the bus. I remember jumping out and praying that we are not jumping into a ditch because we couldn’t see.

Eventually, I felt my leg touch the ground and then ran (alongside every other person) away from the bus. I was shaking! Like really shaking! But yeah, again! I was grateful.
When I calmed down (more like after getting home, sleeping and then waking up), I began to wonder...

...Between the Festac incident and this, was God trying to get my attention? Smh! I felt so though, until one day when the bus I took from Yaba had a faulty brake on third mainland bridge. At this point, it dawned on me that faulty danfo buses were a normal thing in Lagos. I mean, it's hard to find a bus that is not shaking. So somehow, I am almost always scared when on danfo on third mainland bridge. But oh well.

5. Oh! Yes… Twice pick pockets almost picked my bag at obalende. The first time wasn’t that bad; he had only unzipped a side of my bag before I turned and he ran away. But the second time? The guy's hand was already inside my bag and when I turned, he looked at me dead in the eye with so much indifference that I started shaking. And he didn’t even run, he just turned and kept walking away like I was the one at fault. I was so scared. That eyes could kill without flinching. Scarier thing? Other people were around there watching him unzip and put his hand inside my bag but them no talk anything ni. Smh!

This! this solidified my Lagos Paranoia. Now, I’m crazy scared of Danfo buses especially on the third mainland bridge, I’m always watching my back, holding my bag tight, working fast and frowning in places like obalende, taking Uber at nights rather than any form of public transport but more, even when I’m not holding anything valuable, I’m always turning, watching my back and side. Even when I’m strolling down my street, I’m always wary of whoever is at my back, even if it’s a child. Oh dear Lagos!

6. Apparently, though, I’m not still careful enough as someone stole my phone from my pocket in a Keke at V.I about a month ago. I sha think this was jazz sha. Honestly! And it made me angry, not paranoid, not sad, just pissed. But yeah! The honest truth is I was pissed at myself, not because my phone was stolen but because of the warning signs, I ignored twice! 

7. But also, Lagos has been great too! Aside Mfon events (I have sworn to be a volunteer to her anytime I am available because I honestly get blessed each time), I have René and it’s getting incredibly better each day (Thank You Jesus. You are a great CEO), and my 9–5 is great too. The culture, the atmosphere, the people at Webcoupers are just amazing. Working at Webcoupers has taught me so much about entrepreneurship and life. My bosses are GoSH! I want to be like both of them in different ways. Yea! Google Digital Skills, the training (training people) in Lagos opened me up to Lagos, — gave me a level of visibility and purpose. Also, I started my first online course and loved it.

8. Yes Yes Yes! House on the Rock. I have loved this church and Pst. Paul for ages and been in Lagos has helped me hear him speak in real time. I was able to attend TAPE and SLC (heard Td Jakes peach in real life). #EMERGE. TAPE was particularly beautiful for me in ways that I cannot begin to explain. Dancing and worshipping God at TAPE was I don't know ... a thing! (for lack of a better word). I had a specific request at TAPE that didn't pull through but it got nothing away from that experience.

I haven’t had so many victories this year, gotten more than a few disappointments but they have taught me resilience and faith and strengthen my resolve to keep going. I’m super grateful for ease and favor in the little things like a great place to work, a great great place to live and friends that care. And oh! I feel a change! I feel God. I believe that the last months of this year would be the best. God has got me.

Indeed, Lagos has taught to me more paranoid, to watch my back, but it is also teaching me maturity and self-dependency and responsibility and discipline.

Lagos has been Good to me and I can’t wait to finish NYSC. I hate going for CDS. I’m rogue 😁

WOW WOW WOW! YOU ARE A REAL MVP IF YOU READ TILL THIS POINT.
THANK YOU SO MUCH! YOU ARE APPRECIATED.
Did you enjoy the post tho? If yes! Leave a comment and share the link... Love you.

PS: I'd be turning 22 in a few weeks and in a few days, I'd be posting 22 lessons I learnt in my 21st year. Watch out! Preferably, subscribe to the blog :D

Sunday, September 10, 2017

Dear Jesus, HELP!


I really didn't want to post this but ... I think I need to. So Here it is, my personal letter to Jesus.


''Funny thing is, I wrote it a few days before posting it and the next day, Jesus Answered! Maybe, that's why I'm comfortable posting it now because he has already answered. I don't know but I do know that God is amazing
And I pray that as you read, if you need His help in any way, in any form, and for anything, I hope he answers you on time - promptly as He did mine. 
Bear in mind that God spoke to me - calmed my storm, started the work in a very unusual way and in an unusual place. So, if you need Him, do not box Him. Just sincerely ask for help in any way you can - in writing like I did or in speaking or in whatever form - just be sincere and let him answer in His own time and in His own way. But be rest assured that He would answer!''

So Below is a letter I wrote to Jesus a few days ago because I was down - emotionally, spiritually and in every way possible. I just felt empty. I have been feeling this way for a while now though but it was time to plead and since I have been finding it hard to pray, I wrote this.

Eh, I can't say enjoy... Just well, read.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

'Dear Jesus,

Let me start with, I Miss You.

Saturday, February 25, 2017

My NYSC Orientation Camp Experience

January 20th, 2017: Four Missed calls.

I had been in my sitting room while my phone was on my bed. Apparently, Joyce had been trying to call me for awhile now but I wasn't picking. I picked up my phone and saw a text 'Where were you posted to'.

'OMG!' I thought to myself. 'Posting is out.'  In that moment, I started shaking, my heart was beating, so I called Mudia to hear from him first.

'Hey you, where dem post you go'.
'Sokoto.
...and I didn't choose it o' he replied.

'Damn! Wow! Now I'm really scared.
Oya stay on the phone, I'm opening NYSC portal now'. I said

A few Seconds later, I was breathing a sigh of relief as I saw on my NYSC Page.

State of Deployment: OYO.

.... Four days later, Joyce escorted me to Iseyin park at Ibadan as I boarded a bus that would take me to the place I was to camp for the next three weeks.

Disclaimer: I can't tell you everything that happened, I'm just going to drop my highlights.



Saturday, December 31, 2016

MY 2016 HIGHLIGHTS AND GRATITUDE

WARNING: VERY LONG POST

PreScript: I'm torn between writing this as a Letter of Gratitude to God and writing it as a narrative of my year 2016 and so it would be both. It would start as a letter but if it follows the already written script in my head, along the line it would seem like a narrative. That said! let us flow.




Dear Lord,
I am immensely grateful for the year 2016. For relationships sustained, those made and those that blossomed. I am grateful for how career took off, for opportunities and Journey mercies. I am grateful for turning 21 and lessons learned, I am grateful for love. I am grateful for delays that weren't denials. 

The year started with Ministry... TGIF and WhatsApp masterclasses. For the vision, the team members - Milton, Samuel, and Derrick, for the lives touched and the souls won - OH! the Joy that filled my heart when those kids stood up to give their lives to Christ, Lord I am grateful. For our Bible Study Sessions, the friendship watered and the lessons learned. I am grateful.
As TGIF continued and grew - as we took off, the busyness began. It started with classes at CCT. oh! CCT, Microsoft Word, and Excel classes taught me that no matter how great you are at something, there is always something extra that can be learned. I did shine in those MS classes, hehe! blew their minds during the seminar presentation and then came MySQL. Database Management, first real IT - related challenge I faced. I'm grateful for the opportunity to acquire those certifications - Complete Ms. Office and MySQL.

It was during CCT, I did the Google - Digital Marketing Trainings in Benin. First met Rev. Laurie - her warmth is contagious sha. Trained over 150 people, had the best feedbacks EVER! Nodded to myself and said... Teaching/Training is for you. Event organization? A piece of cake too.

Amidst CCT, came my first real job - though remotely - with the best Boss ever, Bola of GTech Designs. She totally represented the kind of boss I'd love to be. Work with her gave me confidence in my skills as well as boosted my beloved resume. GTech Designs was an experience I'd love to repeat again. (lol! Permit me to be vain - even if it's just to brag that I work for a company in the US.) The learning curve was HUGE! I'd be eternally grateful for it - the Money was awesome too, lol but the learning experience was the best. And so, to you Lord - for the opportunity, for willing me to send my cv even when I already said to myself that I didn't want the job, I'm grateful. To Hendrix, for the referral and to Bola for taking a chance on a raw talent... I am grateful.

Just before the illness episode, right before I quit with GTech, came the AdWords Analyst job with Hotels.ng. Lol! Twitter Conversation with Mark, no cv, no tests but got the job... Maybe it was the referral from Taslim or maybe because you Lord wanted me to better understand and develop my AdWords Skill. Whichever one, that one month was Epic! Another good cash mixed with awesome learning Experience. Google Search and Taslim, you guys saw me through this.

As Hotels and GTech came to a close, I dragged Joyce to DBM+,  that began a new era for Rene and began the traveling episodes that didn't end until December. DBM+? I remember Ayo's class on STDC Framework, I remember the project brief and how I effortlessly developed the strategy and slide for my whole team. I remember presenting extra fast because of time and feeling intimated (for the first time in my public speaking career) by that other Lady, by how calmly she delivered. Coming second place was good for the team but my ego suffered a blow. I remember spraining my ankle at Mag Mercy and the two weeks sentence to pain and walking with one leg.

Oh Yes! that first time at Mag Mercy was where I gave up on that love when I realized my place had been taken months ago. The pain, the Denial, the Acceptance, and Lord, you remember the few weeks that followed? The inner struggle, the fight to not show pain, the struggle to remain calm & collected like it was no big deal. The way I rebounded. lol! That 2/3weeks relationship we both needed for our individual selfish reasons..., Darl you remember? Fun time! Ironically, though, that 2/3weeks was stage 1, I had no idea that completely getting over that would take a lot longer... But It's cool. One of those things that showed me how STRONG I was. The experience that soared my emotional intelligence. I'm grateful for it sha, very grateful especially because of how immensely beautiful the friendship has blossomed to be.

So Yes! DBM+ plus was an experience to remember. What followed? Star Agency trips. The excitement that followed after that 20 minutes interview with Tolu, meeting Yewande and the hope that filled our hearts when we saw the potentials Rene had. It was somewhere between before DBM+ and star Agency Interview that Uzo came on board yea? lol! I remember trying to emulate Bola, to as nice, sweet and yet stern like she was. Mentoring Uzo on Content, amazed at her willingness to learn. The times I got pissed at the distraction - allowing personal ish affect work but handling it so maturely. I love team/people management sha! That's it.

Where did we go from here? Star Agency training, CYF! Yes CYF... I'm a barrier breaker, I'm a line crosser. The respect I developed for akpororo because of how into God he is. My commitment with you on 10x greater. Meeting Pst Niyi and Pst. Edosa who later became one of our favorite clients/retainers.

Just after CYF was the speaking to Teenagers, First at the Apostolic Church in Warri via Zion (the kids were awesome. It was heartbreaking seeing how ignorant of the internet they were but yet how willing to embrace knowledge they were. I mean, breaking things to the barest minimum was hard and even so, I feared they wouldn't get it but the questions, the reviews and Thank you ma's I got filled me with so much warmth, so much purpose and longing to do more. It is my desire that those kids would learn more about the possibilities on the internet), and then the one at Baptist church Benin via Osato - those kids were harsh mehn! lol, the Kids at Warri were ignorant yet receptive, these ones? they did not send mehn. They just wanted to rest... lol! Broke my heart sha and then the best at LFC, Warri! hmm mmm.... Heartwarming. I can't begin to describe it... I don't know if it was my delivery and how all the Teens Teacher and the Senior Pastor's Wife gushed over me, or how enthusiastic to learn the kids were or maybe it was because they were neither ignorant nor non-receptive and so the mix was excellent. Whatever it was, I had a GREAT TIME speaking there. Thanks, ETE, for the vote of confidence.

I can't remember exactly when but I know both eBooks - goal setting and the online business eBook was released before the LFC appointment right? Anyway, whatever the timeline... Lord Jesus, I am super grateful for the ability and capacity to write and with the help of Joyce and Rene, release two eBooks this year. The feedbacks, oh the feedbacks warms my heart every time. Kudos to Jerry for the Design of the online business ebook.

So many wonderful things happened this year, I'm struggling to remember them... so let's just go Straight to my 21st Birthday.

But First, Webcoupers. I remember I officially began work at Webcoupers, October 4th yea? Yea! Webcoupers was the first live job interview I have had and yes, I aced it... I'd carefully leave the dynamics of the job out but I'm super grateful, like super grateful for the job at Webcoupers. The last three months even though I get to work remotely has already given me so much professional agency experience and my colleagues are great, learned so much from Oyinda already.

21st...I turned 21 this year. I remember how I freaked out three months to October. I couldn't believe I'd be turning 21 - an adult but as always you calmed me, telling me how you got my back and how everything would be alright. How you'd ensure my adult days are far glorious than teen years and so, all I could do on that day, was bask in love. My birthday was awesome. I almost cried a couple of times and then eventually when that CFite called, I let the tears pour. Lord, Thanks for using me, for allowing me to be an inspiration to so many people. I am most grateful for that,. For the accoladesI get, for the thank yous, the prayers and wishes, Lord I am grateful. Oh Yes, I remember that Mumsi sent me off on my birthday, the woman was so excited that her baby turned 21 and so repeatedly said she was sending me off! Amazing!

I remember that aside my birthday, two other amazing things happened in October, I met Bishop Feb then from that 15minutes meeting got to meet Maya, Yele, and Registered for HGAS which held in November. HGAS was one of our most productive trips to Lagos this year. 1. Because of the people we met - Debola Williams, Uche Pedro, Yele, Vconnect CEO, Dr. Ndidi Edozien. 2. Because of what it did to our minds. and yea! it was on that trip I finally holla'ed at and saw Ejay again after our big-ish a year and six months before. HGAS got us tentatively two acquisition channels/partnerships and for that, I am immensely grateful. Immensely Lord.

Yea! the other amazing thing was Mumsi's birthday on the 30th. Lord, Thanks for providing for me to celebrate her. Lol! I remember how we all started crying - Myself, Kaiser, Chisom and Jerome when I started my own tribute. Thank you for my Mum Lord. Because of her, I know you love me. I couldn't have had a better Mum.

November was a great month too, aside from attending HGAS, it was the month I started working at Rejuvenate Media (Yes! 4th Company aside Rene I worked with this year... Lord, when you said Jobs would look for me, I didn't know It would start so soon and for this again, I am extremely grateful...much more because this is just the beginning... For you promised that the latter would always be greater). RJV was easy, fun work. Manny thanks for rooting for me. I greatly appreciate the opportunity to work at RJV (hehe! the extra cash came in handy, oh Yes! it did. It paid its dues in December)... November/December, My months of overflow. A great way to end the year yea?

Oh, Wait! November was the month I taught Social Media for Bytemars yea? While the live class was great, The webinar class was my favorite, always wanted to hold a webinar and Bytemars gave me that opportunity.

December! This Month. It has been the toughest month - emotionally thus far. From dealing with Mumsi's illness, seeing her in so much pain, to her going for surgery and me been scared shitless to falling in love, Seeing Chisom get Married, visiting an orphanage... lol. This month was eventful. But here Lord, you showed me clearly that 1. Delay is never Denial 2. All that money you enabled me make this year was for a cause 3. You would ALWAYS MAKE A WAY. I don't know how to write how GRATEFUL I am, for keeping my mum, for providing the finances, For giving me a skill and opportunities, for MAKING A WAY! I am most grateful.

I know I'm still dealing with that particular ish - the messed up situation and I can only pray you give me the willpower and ability to not blow things over. Keep me Sane! Keep the ish Quiet... Let's all move on with our lives bikonu.

So, Lord, this is me saying Thank you for my best year yet! For an Amazing 2016. Thank you for keeping NYSC away this year, I appreciate the opportunity it gave me to explore and discover.
Thank you for Journey mercies. Oh lord! Thank you for Journey Mercies to and fro Lagos - Benin, Ibadan - Benin, Warri - Benin and Benin - Benin! oh Yes! the few Abraka - Benin in the early weeks of the year.

Thank you for a Mum who gave me the opportunity and permission to do me...
Thank you for Rene Lord! Thank you for Rene. For the idea, for the business, for the clients, for the team, for Joyce... I am very regretful for Joyce, for being someone I can talk to, learn from and grow with. For her always being there. I totally appreciate you... see Eh, if you read this, just go to Abraham's IG page and find the repost of my birthday message to you and then all the thank you tags I have put on IG for you. I cannot type it all.

Thank you for the Clan, For Kaiser and our blossoming friendship, though the nigga is always harassing me to eat and drink water, he remains one of the most disciplined and loyal male friends ever. For Darlington, though your God maybe not exist phase creeped us all out, we love you till thy kingdom comes. I'm super excited that you have found the ish you want to focus on, I pray you stick with it. You remain one of the most intelligent people I know and I still hope, she finally says yes in January 2017. Maybe your luck would turn lucky for me. For Ete, lol! weird one, It was great to finally know you, not just as Chisom's friend but as mine too. I see the craziness. Chisom, you remain one of my favorite people on planet earth. Let's leave it at that. No! Lemme add that from the deepest, purest and most sincere part of my heart, I love you and I wish for you the BEST of marriage. It would bring FAVOUR like you have never seen. WEALTH that you cannot contain. Just bikonu remain you abeg.

Thank you for Jay and my Nephew - Nathan. I love that dude sha. Kai! Thank you for Justice and his Yandi Team! Keep Excelling bro!

Thank you for Gold! Lol! I'm I even supposed to Thank you for that? knowing that it is not exactly something you like/approve but oh well, the ish has shown me a part of me that I didn't know exist and that is something I am grateful for.

oh Yes! the most important thing about this year was that I Learned and I grew. I discovered just how Strong I was, my self-awareness and emotional intelligence was at an all time high. I am grateful for the ability to keeping finding and knowing myself. Lord Jesus! Thank you for me, for the lives, I inspire... and those who inspire me, from Steve Harris to John Obidi, to iFunto, to Adaora, down to Chude, to Heather Lindsey etc etc.

I know I forgot a lot of other amazing things that happened this year, especially those special moments like conversations and chats that were an icing on the cake. They were plenty... too much Lord! My screenshot folder is full, I'd keep it for the days I feel like quitting.  I can't even count how many people I mentored this year. God sha!

Thank you, Lord, for helping we check out most of my goals for the year 2016. Let us do it again in 2017. Did I forget to thank you for the ability to Multitask? Since May, working for 2/3 companies simultaneously. I'm grateful for the strength - while the combined cash was always awesome, the mental stress was so NOT EASY. 

Thank you for 2017 would be a far GREATER YEAR. At least 10x GREATER. 2017 is my year of GREAT EXPLOITS. 2017 is my year of EXEMPTION, when the majority say there is recession or a casting down or that it is not possible or too hard, my testimony would be that MY CASE IS DIFFERENT. In Advance, thank you for Journey mercies ... I agree to travel more in 2017, for more training and summits, for greater meetings and to just explore. Thank you for Relationships, the once that would be sustained and the ones that would be formed. Thank your for NYSC, for Lagos, for my PPA, for I will testify that MY CASE is different and Delay isn't denial. Thank you for Finances... Lord, the money I would make in 2017 would shock me. The investments and things the money would do would be AWESOMELY SUPER EXTRA AMAZING AND TO YOUR GLORY. In 2017, Love would find me... In 2017, Health is my portion on a steady. In 2017, more brands would spring up and blow... From TUA to the Agric Ish, Investment Co et al. Clients that Rene would have in 2017 sha! OH MY GOD! I'd write more in 2017, blogs, books... who knows maybe a hard copy? Cheers to more certifications. We start First week of January!

Thank you for being my chief strategist, because of you I know that all things always WORK TOGETHER for Good. I commit my life into your hands, Lord. Let your will be done.




Yours' for Life!
ITIMI, Egwolome Peace.


Thursday, December 29, 2016

The Popular Concept of Open-Mindedness is Flawed

A few weeks ago, I got obsessed with the concept of open-mindedness and this was because I was in situations and conversations, that required me to be 'open minded', nonjudgemental and receptive to people's different truth. It was a great test but as I explored and trained my mind to be more open minded I began to wonder if there was a limit and if yes! What was it? I mean, to what extent does one stay open minded? Does open-mindedness require you take everything? Does it mean to have no filter? No boundaries? Does been nonjudgemental mean you 'fit in'? Where is the stopping point?

The more I thought about it, the more obsessed I became and so of cause, I kept thinking about it - and doing surveys - until I found for myself (Lord, Thank you for blessing me with an amazing analytical mind), an answer that felt right (Mind you! This is my opinion). With this answer, I concluded that the 'general perception of open-mindedness' is flawed. Here's why.


First of all, let's define open mindedness.
I asked a few friends what open mindedness meant to them and most of them responded by referring me to the Zen Story of a cup of Tea. And so it seemed that open-mindedness is likened to being open to new ideas/opinions, being open/receptive to learning, not necessarily having a filter but coming like a child, always open to learning, not holding your opinions and beliefs as truth but willing to accept the opinions and beliefs of others (if they argue well enough. Lol). This is correct, even Wikipedia says open-mindedness is receptiveness to new ideas.

This is also where I think the concept of open-mindedness is flawed because I believe there should be a limit of some sort to how receptive we are to new ideas and opinions due to how gullible and credulous the mind can be.

Yes! The mind is gullible, it easily bends to what it is continuously exposed to. What you watch, read and hear forms the content of your mind, produces your thought pattern and ultimately forms who you are (as a man thinketh, so he is). This is clearly seen in babies. They come into the world blank, open, and ready to take in, and oh! Take in they do. With No filter, no experience or lessons to look back to, they take in everything they see or hear.

Apostle Pauls advises in Rom 12:2 that we should constantly renew our mind so we can be transformed by God's word lest we would conform to the things of the world. It other words, Focus on God's word so your mind and thoughts do not get filled with the things of the world because once you pay much attention to those things, you would naturally conform. 

And so when we are advised to be receptive to new ideas and opinions, it is an advice that puts our minds at risk. Because if what we are being told makes sense, If it sounds logically correct and the other person knows how to put forth a great argument, then it would be easy to convince our minds to pick the new information and call it truth.

This bothered me a lot. I began to think, does this mean that I should stay closed minded? Do not partake conversations that are contradictory to what I currently know? {Yes! In business, being receptive to new creative ideas is highly advised (I advise it too)}, but when it comes to our belief systems ... That gave me a pause.  If I stay closed minded in an attempt to protect my mind (Prov 4:23 CEB - More than anything you guard, protect your mind, for life flows from it), then how do I learn? How do I grow?.

This new set of questions, drove me into another round of obsession but as usual, if you diligently seek light (knowledge), you would find it (James 1:5 - If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking).

So Anyway, I realized that a great way to stay open-minded (receptive and willing to new ideas/opinions) is to develop a backdrop for your mind, a foundation that acts as a filter to which all new ideas have to pass through before they settle in. This way, while you still listen to and engage in open-minded conversations, read various kind of books et al, you would always have a filter that every information has to pass through and 'fight with'.

I recommend no other filter that the Word of God - (lol, for the atheists and non-believers, I guess you would have to figure out for yourself your core beliefs and stick with them otherwise, you'd be continually tossed back and forth, left and right by every new opinion you hear, by motivational/inspirational messages, and by logically sound ideas).

It's great to be open minded, that's the only way to learn, but you have got to protect your mind and ensure that it doesn't mess with your beliefs. It's important to love your truth, but to live your truth, you have to first discover what your truth is and always leaning to what you read in motivational or what not books wouldn't help.

Now, I understand that just because one is open-minded doesn't mean they accept any idea the minute it is presented to them. It's expedient that you always consider thoughtfully or evaluate new ideas and beliefs before you accept them as true but my issue is this: The more you are exposed to an idea or opinion, the more likely you are to accept it. The more eloquent the person selling the idea to you is and the more motivational/inspirational and logically sound an idea is, greatly increases the likelihood of its acceptability. Thus, without you consciously developing and using your filter, the more gullible (albeit subtle) you would become.

So in this coming year (2017), DELIBERATELY PROTECT YOUR MIND. GUARD YOUR BELIEFS. FIND YOUR TRUTH AND LIVE IT.

I'd love to hear your thoughts. Do share with me by commenting. Gracias!


Thursday, October 27, 2016

How our Experiences and Information Influences our Perception and Understanding of life.


Have you ever had that eureka moment? You know that moment when suddenly things that were not clear to you once before, becomes really clear and then you realize that you fully understood the situation? I bet it has happened to most people here. I bet we all can, in some way relate to that ‘ah ah! this is it, yeah?’ feeling. I particularly remember one of my most formidable ‘ah ah, so this is it’ moment. It happened a few months ago. I was thinking about the period of my life in the university when my life was filled with so much drama because of my friends. They were a lot of happy times, lessons learnt and growth but also a lot of quarrels, disappointment, depression and hurts (You know how girls can be yea?). So anyway, a few months back, I began to play everything back,
right from the first day I met this particular friend to the day I decided I didn’t want to be friends anymore. I played back as many scenes as I could remember, I analysed each situation, my reaction, what could have been done differently and what really couldn’t be avoided. I spent weeks thinking and analyzing my feelings during that three years and in that period of reflection - unbiased reflection, I got to know myself a lot better and I realized one very shocking fact: that as smart as I and everyone thought I was, I was really naive and gullible at that time. You see that fact - that light, changed a lot of things but most importantly, it gave me a different view of my world as I began to see a couple of things very differently.
When I understood, things that looked complex and really weird, suddenly began to make sense.
You see, we mystify and call complex what we do not know or understand.

This is what I want to explain, the theory of complexity as it relates to how much we know and understand.

Monday, August 29, 2016

F.O.C.U.S; Achieving the Most - (Guest)



For many people, jumping into new projects without finishing the other one is the way to go. They keep having things in their head they want to accomplish. They want to improve on their job, start a fashion business on the side, start a family, link up with a cousin abroad to start importation...They want to do it all so they get into all these and lack the ability to see anyone to completion. At the end of the year, they are left with unfinished goals. But they felt excited at the start; they were motivated at the beginning only for the motivation to wane over time. They move on to other new projects and then the cycle repeats itself.

Monday, June 6, 2016

Life Lessons 2.0 | What Growing Up is Teaching Me.

Peace Itimi, Why haven't you written in so long?  

''I don't have a good enough reason but allow me to try please? Thanks.

...because so much has been going on in my inside. Because I'm growing up and figuring out who I want to be, what I want to do, & why I should bother doing the things I do. Because I have written so much in my thoughts but haven't been able to pen them now; specifically for this blog. Because.... I have been focused on something else. Bla Bla Bla. 
Truth is, I have been too Lazy and a bit distracted but mostly lazy. Forgive me alright? 
To further redeem myself, I have decided not to let another month pass without writing something down; So here it is.'''

I have been reading alot Gosh; {the feeling of light filling your heart and mind as a new revelation, information comes to you. Awesome!!!}. Learning is fun... No matter the subject, learning is fun. 

Anyway, Moving on, this post is a list of some life lessons I have deliberately learnt in last months. Some I picked from books, some from experiences, some I heard in my spirit, some came as a result of deep introspection, some well... 





Enjoy!

Lesson one: Your life is Your Own. 

Saturday, April 9, 2016

Embrace the uncertain; Start Now (GUEST)

Peace itimi

As humans, we are uncertain about some things like when we may die, who we may meet on the way tomorrow.  Nonetheless, these things are the spice of life like surprises. Sometimes, you feel as though some people were giving a handbook for life, except you. Do you keep waiting for that special moment when you will finally say “yes I’ve made it” and you feel like you're on top of the world?

Why are you waiting? Start now and act. Most times when we keep on waiting for that special moment when we arrive, we may find out that those special moments may never come. Instead, we work to make them happen. If you want to be an excellent speaker or a prolific writer, you don’t have to wait for a special moment—you start writing, speaking and later that moment comes.